I have been “psychic” since childhood. There is a picture of me as a young child in a high chair, with an ominous-looking dark hallway behind me. My subjective memory of that hallway includes the sensation that other beings were present and watching the movement of shadows. As a child I wondered if other people could sense what I did—and since they did not discuss specific incidents with me, I assumed they did not. Granted, It is not a topic that is easily discussed. I remember being afraid of what I sensed, and others regarded them as normal, childhood fears (and perhaps they are, children are very open to psychic experiences, and I especially enjoy mentoring them!) 🙂
When I was 5, I had a very vivid vision of what I interpreted to be the Virgin Mary (I was raised Roman Catholic.) This beautiful female figure appeared to me in striking detail on the ceiling of my bedroom with my eyes wide open. The entire experience was incredible and super-real. I also heard her speak, she gave guidance to me on what my life would be like, what my purpose was (to help others,) and she encouraged me to follow my path. I do not know for sure exactly who this figure was (how can you know?) but I interpret it now to be a type of guide. It was, and is, one of the most amazing, and deeply impactful, experiences of my life that will never leave me.
I remember several other early experiences: “déjà vu” regarding quite ordinary events and conversations–when I could predict what was going to happen next; sensing and seeing beings and energies, and going into “trance-like,” dissociative states. My grandmother especially understood my interest with her own beliefs and stories: watches would stop when she wore them, electrical devices would act up, and she told me many stories of seeing apparitions of deceased family members.
I also remember a great deal of experiences that occurred during adolescence and throughout college. When I was particularly upset about something, I felt a protective energy around me while smelling roses when none were present. I had later linked this experience back to the vision I had when I was 5. After my grandfather died, I had a series of realistic dreams where we had conversations that contained messages for my grandmother. I had a telepathic connection with my first love—I knew when he was away or at home, and when he was in emotional distress, which was later verified. For a long time I remember a great deal of success in knowing who was calling me on the phone. I was always very good at knowing when people were lying to me. I seemed to know when someone’s intentions were good or bad, and was able to quickly get a sense of someone’s character when meeting them for the first time.
After honing my interest in developing my abilities, sparked by a dedication to a spiritual path, I developed very rapidly through taking classes and working with teachers. I began investigating “haunted” locations with a scientific team and found that my impressions (and my ability to communicate with spirits) were over-riding my investigative skills. I felt that I could “read” places as well as people and objects. I have also had vivid experiences of what could be understood as past-lives through regressions and dream experiences. I have seen apparitions, although most often they are hazy and not complete. Some of the very clear apparitions I have experienced have certainly shaken me up–one was so real I thought someone had broken into my house! However, most mediums such as myself do not see apparitions and dead people walking around all day long. When your beloved relative comes to me in a reading, it is mostly through mental pictures, sensations, feelings, words and other internal impressions.
I see colors, shapes, and forms of energy moving through the environment. I have had a few out-of-body experiences. I have had electrical devices act strangely around me, and have heard external voices and noises, and have had objects move from one location to another in one particular house I lived in. I have also had episodes of psychokinesis (pk.) During periods of really difficult stress, pictures have flown off of mantles and electrical appliances have malfunctioned in unusual ways. That certainly gets your attention, and motivates you to deal with your stress! 🙂
For me, psychic experiences come with the territory and no longer seem paranormal. Obviously, I believe in psi phenomena and have from an early age. I think that largely my beliefs and attitudes stem from personal experience that has been undeniable, though at times unproven objectively. I also feel that my interest and curiosity probably contributed to my experiences in addition to growing up with someone who understood my beliefs. I value and trust the meaning that I create from these experiences, and living my life in an intuitive way has become very second-nature to me—it is something that need not be proven. However, I value parapsychology greatly as another methodology—another way of knowing the same subject matter. I value logical deduction, especially because it is a cultural necessity that assists us to open and consider other ways of knowing. I find many of the details of parapsychological investigation and research fascinating, particularly the study of types of personalities that tend to develop psi abilities. From my own experience and that of my friends and teachers, I have found these observations to be accurate.
My attitude about psi phenomena is that it is wonderful, sometimes mysterious and unexplainable, and fascinating. But I also feel that it is incredibly healing and useful. Particularly in my experience with clients, I feel that it opens them to a broader, more spiritual perspective, helps them heal and make meaning from their lives, provides comfort, teaches them to listen to themselves, and can sometimes be an experience of awakening to who they really are as part of the divine. Of course, psi experiences can be baffling, frightening, and painful as they often shake up one’s worldview quite significantly. This is one reason why I find it so important to counsel those who are having these experiences, as many do not know who to turn to in a world that largely pathologizes them.
That being said, I do not think that all psi experiences are accurately interpreted; I believe that the nature of my work is far from an exact science, and that there is little that we truly understand about such experiences. Therefore, it is useful to question experiences—but in my field, I feel it is more useful to trust them and learn from them. In my opinion, the great majority of mentally sane children and adults have these experiences frequently, although they may not be paying much attention to them. It is simply a natural, rather than supernatural, realm of human experience that needs to be recognized and validated as an important part of our perceptions.