Truths about the Twin Flame Journey

The twin flame journey is ineffable, fundamentally indescribable, a zone that is hard to put words to.  It is sublime, even though many of the world’s great love stories are based upon it, those myths and archetypes are bits and pieces of floating ephemera in comparison to the real thing.  You only know it when you are in it, and you only see it in others when you have witnessed it in yourself.

I don’t mean this in a romantic love story kind of way.  No, it is beyond.  Take whatever you know about love, and the twin flame experience is still further beyond comprehension.

Take your current limitations and declarations of “I can’t” and smash them up against the wall.  Take your understanding of the time space continuum and the beliefs about how your world operates and what you think is possible and trash them.

When you see the truth of what twin flame love is, it is like Paul being struck off his horse by the bolt of God. Imagine that light of truth striking you in the face, surrounding you and infusing you with a kundalini transformation.  That is how Saul became Paul, and every Saul twin flame will become Paul.  It is only a matter of time.

The truth is it is the most mystical, frightening, amazing AND hardest connection you will ever have.  You will be pushed beyond any limitation you have constructed in your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual bodies.

There is no “I can’t.”  And that is the truth about the words, like unconditional love, that we throw around.

It will require you to be utterly alone, digging into the recesses of your unconsciousness for clues to heal yourself.  It will require you to scoop up your inner child off the floor and hold her screaming and crying in your arms.  It is the inner work you do to find out how to love yourself—all of you, the darkest corners of you that the conscious mind has conveniently forgot.  And in the midst of the light and dark, shadow play of awakening, you are both alone and together.

You are both fighting this battle and it gets tiresome and it gets weary.  Twin flames pull the trigger to your own self discovery.  You will never know how deep the rabbit hole goes, because it is a process spiraling ever deeper.  There is always more to learn and discover, clear, heal, work through, so there is never a true “I can’t.”  You can and you will.

It is simply not the path for every soul on this planet.  It does not fit into any box that anyone else could try to conceive of.  It is a kind of growth that not all will experience.  It is not anything like other types of relationships because it is the energetic force that is transforming our very limitations about relationships.

But we have to try to explain this, because it is the forward progression of our conscious understanding of love.  It is the front line of new template creation.  It fits into the grand design, as aspects of its connectedness can be found in our relationship to everything that exists.  There is no one you will understand better, or seek to understand as much, as your twin flame.  And in knowing them, you know very deeply yourself.  Because they are one and the same.  In understanding this unity you can see the unity everywhere.  You can seek to understand your connection to everything and everyone, whether it is pleasant or unpleasant, and especially if it is challenging.

It is an end to the concept of war.  The masculine and feminine inside ourselves can no longer be at war. They have to integrate.  Twin flames are the outer reflection of this inner integration.  We are on the journey back to one.  Back to wholeness.  We are always so close.  But, more whole as we go. And the paradox is, the inner work creates the outer reality.

The truth is, it changes you.  It transforms you.  In ways you don’t understand until later, after you have integrated its teachings.  You are not in control of it, and certainly your ego is a puny force compared to it.  That force of life that allows your heart to beat and your cells to have oxygen and regulates your body is not under the control of your ego.  It does what it does.  It is smarter than you.

It is best to know its ways, rather than to make your ways fit into it. What can I say?  It is a mystery.  It feels like a blessing, it feels like a curse.  It is your life, your journey, your teaching, your path to tread.  Accept it.  Surrender to it.  Learn it. Love it.

Then expand and love more.

Cultivating Forgiveness and Compassion Webinar!

Cultivating Forgiveness and Compassion Webinar

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

8:00 PM – 9:30 PM EST

Everyone knows it is so much easier and helpful to forgive when we are able to understand and be compassionate. In the Buddhist view, real love can only come from forgiveness and compassion. But how? How can we forgive and release our negative emotions about ourselves and others? If you want more peace in your life, and to deepen your understanding of these spiritual virtues, or you are having a hard time forgiving or letting go of hurt, this talk is for you!


If you are not available for the live stream, you will have access to the recording.

Also consider joining my video channel, where you have access to all of my previous webinars and all of the future webinars which are 2 times a month, including this one.  Join here:

Newsletter–Musings on Reincarnation

Enjoy this week’s newsletter, and happy b day to me–still a chance for you to take advantage of my b day sale but ya gotta jump on that now, more details in the newsletter.

Here is a snippet:

This week’s Energetic Forecast: I am sure many of you noticed the total lunar eclipse in Aries on Sunday.  How that affected you will depend on where Aries falls in your natal chart, but lunar eclipses are usually about endings and clearings.  You may feel a lot more clear now than you have in a while that some part of your life has been held back, and you now know why and what for.  This is a good thing, although many people don’t like change or surprises, everyone knows that is how the universe works–you are better off going with the flow that presents itself now.
 I was re-watching Rick Levine’s take on September and it struck me when he said Sept is about “adapting to change while not losing our center.”  That’s perfect. The effects of eclipses are long lasting with a six month window so expect the effects to linger. Still in Mercury retro until Oct 9th, which is basically a “are you sure you know what you are doing?” effect.  We have Mars and Jupiter in Virgo which is willing to work step by step, Saturn in Sag which is making sure we are ready to make real changes.  You may feel like hitting the gas and the brake which is also a good analogy, so take your time, don’t panic, and keep center.
Read more here

Newsletter–Love or Fear?

Enjoy this week’s newsletter!  Here is a snippet:

This week’s Energetic Forecast:
On Saturday we have the full moon in Pisces.  This is a cool one as it is conjunct Neptune and opposite the Sun and Jupiter in Virgo.  Pisces and Virgo are astrological opposites, Pisces is dreamy, spiritual, and sometimes ungrounded.  Virgo is practical, down to earth, ready to serve and help, and Virgo is also the sign of the healer.  My take is this full moon is about healing.  Healing that is coming to fruition in our dreams, in our creativity, or in our spiritual practice.  Let those emotions up and out.  Get in touch with the mystical side of them.  Then think about what you can do with that energy because Virgo wants to make it real.  How can it help others?  On Monday the 31st we also have Mars and Venus in exact conjunction in the sky, these are the masculine and feminine energies respectively, and they have been doing a very interesting dance this year.  Take this as your cue to unite these energies within you.  Overall this week is one of uniting energies that may at first be assumed to be in opposition, but what they need is a good balancing and blending, study the Temperance card in the Tarot as a good example.
Read the rest here
victoria kitty side photo

Journey to Spiritual Partnerships: Soul Connections and the Evolution of Love Pittsburgh Workshop!

Journey to Spiritual Partnerships:

Soul Connections and the Evolution of Love

Sunday Aug 2nd


First United Methodist Church, Fellowship Hall

5401 Centre Ave., Pittsburgh, PA 15232

This in-depth, interactive workshop is a must for learning about the new relationship templates that are forming with the current shift of consciousness on our planet from 3D to 4D and beyond. If you want to understand a soul connection experience such as a karmic soul mate, soul mate, twin flame, or soul catalyst, this is for you. If you are ready to go deep with your own personal growth journey and really do the work to grow in self love and love in relationships, the exercises in this class will jumpstart you in the right direction. If you are looking to open yourself to a new spiritual partnership, we will talk about how to do this through self work.  If you have had the difficult experience of dealing with unhealthy people and relationship patterns, we will discover the deeper meanings and lessons inherent in this experience.   This workshop is a synthesis of past teachings on soul connections, new insights from my personal experience as a twin flame and from my clients, as well as what I just taught in Lily Dale this summer.  It is the complete package of my learning, research, personal experience and coaching experience since I have explored the subject of spiritual partnerships beginning in 2008.  I am passionate about this subject and helping everyone to shift successfully into the beautiful understanding of self love and love for others.  This workshop will spark deep insights and heart openings through a combination of practical theory, reflective exercises, meditations to shift energy, and many other spiritual tools.

Lily Dale Workshop this July: Journey to Spiritual Partnerships

You may know that I have been teaching at Lily Dale, NY since 2012.  Well this year I am expanding my teachings, so this class will not be the same course I have taught in Lily Dale, online, or in various other locations on twin flames, soul connections, and soul mates.  It will include my absolute latest on these topics and more. Here is the description:

Journey to Spiritual Partnerships

Thursday, July 2nd


Lakeside Assembly Hall, Lily Dale Assembly

Lily Dale, NY

Our relationships reflect our inner states of mind, life lessons, and personal growth themes. Learning about ourselves through relationships is a challenging and rewarding path. As we progress through karmic soul mates, soul connections, twin flames, and the newly emerging divine partnerships, we are learning how to love ourselves and others on deeper levels. As we do so we are creating new relationship templates that revolutionize our ideas about love and relating to one another as we spiritually evolve and ascend. Learn about how to create true spiritual partnerships, the different kinds of soul connection relationships, and how to deepen your understanding of the most important force in our universe-LOVE.


The last day for online registration is June 27th, but you can also register at the door, provided seats are available.  The last class I taught at Lily Dale was full.

Also check out the facebook event. I hope to see you there!  Lily Dale is a cool place to visit if you have never been there, especially in the summer when there are many awesome classes being taught by spiritual leaders from around the world.  🙂

How to Find a Loving Relationship

Many of my single clients ask me when they will find a partner or how to meet their soul mate.  Many of my female clients speak of feeling an intense desire to find this, particularly if they are reaching the end of their childbearing years.  Definitions aside, what I think people are really looking for in a “soul mate” (beyond a good parent for their offspring) is a healthy, loving relationship, with a person who is a good fit for them.  A totally understandable and very normal  human need.

However, sometimes this human need does have origins and elements of personal issues that need to be worked out.  My intuitive insight is specific for each person, of course, but generally, my first point of advice is to get a handle on any feelings of desperation.  We do spend a lot of time trying to find happiness outside of ourselves, so a big consideration is just being happy with oneself, which is the journey of all of us, really.  This is definitely not something that will generally be encouraged by a culture constantly telling us that the breakfast cereal we eat or the car we buy will magnetize someone to them–a la Axe Body spray.  The general message is one of buy more stuff, or focus more on your personal appearance, and this in turn, makes you happy and therefore attractive to others.  In the new age and spiritual community, the take is different.  Since the law of attraction has hit our culture, we may think that through the power of desire, intention, acting ‘as if’ you already have what you want, creating your own reality through your thoughts, and affirming and visualizing your way to what you want can make it happen for you just like magic.

Let’s look at this law of attraction from a different angle.  If you are in a state of desperately searching for someone, constantly trolling online dating sites to exclusion of other daily functions, and are so worried that you will never find that person, you are focusing on what you feel to be is a very large LACK.  You are focusing negatively on what you do not have and are expending a lot of emotional energy fretting and writhing. Law of attraction aside, I think mostly what this achieves is a state of frustration.  It may not be easy but the first step is to stop the desperation, stop the worry, and even, stop incessantly looking.  If you want to make the law of attraction work for you, and go about your life in a healthier and happier way, then you must examine those feelings of desperation, understand where they are coming from, feel them, and resolve to release them and move on.  Notice I did not say, lock yourself in a closet and repeat “I have found my soul mate, I have found my soul mate,” until you are blue in the face. Any amount of repeated positive affirmations is not going to do squat for you if somewhere in there, in your energy, you are truly, unhappy with yourself and incredibly desperate to fix this through the “other.”

As a psychic, to me energy is everything.  Many people are surprised to find out in readings that energetically, what they thought they were “over,” and had never processed but merely shoved under the rug, is still there.  In some ways, what you resist, do not allow yourself to experience, and suppress, persists.  Clients who are truly interested in finding out where they may be blocking themselves and who do the self work to release these blocks, are going to progress much faster than those who do not wish to deal with their pain, their suffering, their traumas, their childhoods, their emotions, etc.  This is not to place blame on yourself if the partner of your dreams does not show up tomorrow.  But in truth, the only control we have is over ourselves, and our own happiness.  At any point, we can start that process.

The best advice I have, rather than spending your money on books and programs that promise to bring your soul mate to you, is to concentrate on yourself.  This seems a little counter-intuitive, but, it works.  Take an honest look at yourself.  Are you happy with who you are?  Are you still carrying negative self talk in your brain?  These issues are all very important, irrespective of your search for a partner, and these are lifelong issues to consider.  However, working through things and becoming happier, and loosening your grip on your “must have a partner” mantra is going to help you attract just what you need, and learn a lot along the way.

What do I mean by this? I mean be the person you want to see and to attract.  We are in constant relationship in our lives, to our pets, to the planet, to ourselves, to our bosses, to everything.  By being the “change you want to see,” you are  improving your relationship with the entire cosmos.  But cultivating a good heart vis-a-vis ALL of your relationships, you are raising your vibration, and by raising your vibration you are happy….no matter who or what comes along, or doesn’t. 🙂

Raising your vibration and clearing your baggage also does attract a new energy to you.  It makes it more likely that the kind of person you want will find you.  Of course, we can’t be doing it just for that reason.  We have to do it for ourselves.  This is a process of SELF-LOVE.

How can we do this?  By developing your most cherished talents and abilities and giving these back to the world.  Look at your soul—who are you?  What are you here to give to others?  What makes you excited and feeling good about your life?  One little secret is, that by feeling purposeful by helping others, and by giving, we receive more than we could ever imagine.  Go out and pursue the things that interest you.  Get involved with others.  Give what you are meant to give to this world to make it a better place.  Then guess what happens when you are an animal lover and you decide to start volunteering at your local animal shelter?  Not only are you happy with the time you are spending in your life, you are also around others who love animals as you do.  You connect more with those who are on your wavelength.  You feel less isolated, more purposeful, and happy.  And then one day… make friends, and you find your awesome animal lover dude, or dude-et!

Work through your blocks and work on your issues and “stuff.”  If you need help, ask for it.  It is often very helpful to work on understanding and releasing things with a therapist, with a friend, with spiritual practitioners.  Specifically, work on being clear of your relationship baggage. Let go of the past!! Be ready to open your heart and love again!  Many of us, because of tough experiences we have had, close down our hearts.  We try to protect ourselves from the love we want because we fear pain.  But, pain is a part of life.  It can strengthen you, and you can grow from those experiences.  You would never be the person you are now, without having gone through everything that has been hard for you.  Does this mean that once you open your heart again, that your relationship will be pain-free and that person will never hurt you? No, that is not possible.  You will be hurt.  But you will also love.  If you don’t take the risk to love, your heart is hurting, you are disconnected, you shut down, and you do not allow the love that you want. How’s that for a regret?

You can also have a spiritual focus and be authentic in your life.  This helps you to deal with challenges that come your way.  Being yourself, a life-long lesson for many, can bring you so much happiness in itself.  And if you are not yourself, and are living someone else’s life proscribed for you, then how can you expect to attract anyone who can see the real you?

Listen to your intuitions about people and follow them!! But note, that we don’t listen to our intuitions in order to be pain-free.  There is no such thing as pain-free.  Stop looking for that, it is not realistic.  But you can listen to what your heart is saying.  And, allow yourself to get really clear on this.  Do I want this, or don’t I?

Intention, visualization, affirmations, etc can help but YOU must be ready on a soul level, YOU must do the work.  Having an intention that is positive is great, but intentions must be backed up by actions.  Visualization and affirmations are great, they are tools you can use to affirm the work you have already done.  But the work happens inside you.  There are simply, no quick fixes, magical cures, spells, potions, prayers, or mojo that is going to do your work for you.  No psychic in the world is going to re-unite you with your ex, or do some hocus pocus on you that is going to solve your problems.  I think that what the law of attraction does, is attract what is resonating with your energy, and your energy is deeper than a 5 minute affirmation.  You must believe what you are affirming, truly, deep down in your guts.

Finally, believe that it is possible, and let the universe do the rest.  Let go, and trust that what you need in life, comes to you in the way it needs to on the time schedule that best suits everyone.

Elements of a Healthy Relationship

Maybe this post won’t attract as much attention as those on twin flames and soul mates, which may or may not, actually be a healthy relationship!  I do think it is very important to know what is healthy, if your relationship is not, maybe these are points you can start with.  I have read a lot, and have seen a lot, of twin flames, or soul mates, who will justify other’s behaviors and allow themselves to be destroyed by someone because they are your soul mate, or twin flame.  SELF-LOVE, that is what we forget in these situations, and that’s pretty much all I have to say.
These are things you can only change about yourself.  You cannot change another person, without the express free will and desire on their part, and then THEIR ACTION, to change.  The best person for you to worry about is yourself, because you can change yourself.  If your relationship is not healthy, you have a few choices.  You both work TOGETHER on it, or you don’t engage in the unhealthy behavior.  And sometimes it does mean that the nature of the relationship must change, or the relationship needs to end.  Yes, I said…end.  Relationships are not a failure necessarily just because they change or end.  It may not be that simple to do, but in theory, it really is that simple.  🙂
Do you have……
  • Mutual respect
  • Moving towards unconditional love and acceptance
  • Realistic and accepting of faults and imperfections, not overly romanticized
  • No ignoring and no need to chase, no running
  • VERY LITTLE emotional abuse, verbal, or physical ( abuse is not ok, that being said, we are not perfect, it is not abuse just because you disagree)
  • Very little ego games and emotional manipulation
  • Willingness to learn and understand the other, compassion
  • Commitment in some form, effort is shown and reciprocated
  • Allows you to grow individually, not only when together, relationship is a priority but does not take over your life
  • Agreements are kept
  • You can say no!
  • They act like they care and so do you! It is nurturing, comfortable and fun
  • Emotions are dealt with in a real way, no need for drama, conflicts and differences are managed without major despair and threats
  • Communication of wants, needs, feelings without shame
  • Honesty
  • Compatibility
  • You are BOTH healthy enough to be able to love (ex:  someone who is addicted to drugs or alcohol has no business doing anything but turning an immediate emergency supply of love to themselves, FIRST)
  • You don’t need the relationship to be happy or a whole person.

If you want a relationship like this, BE the person you wanna SEE.  It is mostly about your ability to BE love and a loving person, when you are able to do this, and love yourself, you will attract someone who can mirror these qualities back to you, eventually!

Soul Mates 101

“You don’t give love in order to get love, you give love in order to become love” –Apollo Poetry


Ah, soul mates.  Can’t live with them (many times,) can’t live without them (all the time.)  What is this crazy phenomenon?  A lot has been written on this subject, and it can fall into several categories.  The popular understanding of the term is more of a myth than a reality.  The myth goes something like this: We have one shot to get it right in this lifetime, with our ONE and ONLY soul mate, the one who will make our lives complete, and is our perfect compliment.  If you are soul mates, you are destined to be together….forever!  Once you find that person, you will experience never ending bliss for the rest of your life, and your relationship will finally work the way it was meant to work…easy, idyllic, no work required, effortless harmony, and you will be enlightened with all of your spiritual voids filled.  This is a myth–a cultural story–and it even has an advertising program that wants you to buy into this philosophy.  It may sell some perfume, but what I am talking about is more about personal experiences and patterns in the process of personal development.  And, no disrespect here, but programs that promise to find your soul mate in 30 days—it is not that simple.  It happens when you are ready for it.

This is most definitely, a MYTH.  Why?  First, we have many soul mates.  Once you get started on the soul mate/ relationship as a spiritual path, you will probably have a succession of soul mates.  I personally have a count of about 7.  Although there is great compatibility with soul mates,  and they may very well be a perfect fit, the relationship (if there is one) is not meant to make your life complete.  Soul mates are not necessarily destined to be together forever.  Because the connection is so strong, it is very easy to think that because of its depth, it is therefore everlasting.  Some people are able to make it work with their soul mates, but not without the great amount of inner work and personal development that a deep connection requires.  Many times, soul mates are not meant to be in your life for as long as you may want them to.  Many times, one or both of you are not able to do what it would require for you to be together.  That is not the fault of Madame Destiny, it is just simply, life and its challenges.  And life’s lessons.


Soul mates are meant to help you grow, deeply grow, and to “give love so you can become love.”  It is a profoundly challenging relationship that is not for the faint of heart or a die-hard romantic.  It changes YOU, on the inside.  And as you change, what is vibrationally a fit now, may not always be so.  Because, we are always changing.  As the Buddha would say, the nature of life is impermanent.


Now that we have the myth out of the way, here is a pretty good, spiritual interpretation of what happens here.  It is part of the Law of Attraction, that soul mates are drawn in by your soul’s essence, who you really are at a deep level, your vibrational level, and your karma.  I don’t mean karma as in, this is your punishment for evils done in a past life! Karma can be considered to be, what keeps you from floating off this earth plane into a cloud of total enlightenment.  It is what keeps you learning lessons, the stuff of karma is your lessons, your issues, what needs to be cleared that keeps you from knowing that you are one with God and everything in this universe. Karma is your “stuff.”  Deep, huh?


Soul mates show you your “stuff.”  There is perfect analogy for this, and it is called, funny enough, “mirroring.”  Soul mates lift up a big mirror for you to look in, so that you can know thyself more deeply.  This is a two-way mirror, so you are also doing this for said beloved.  Now, to an extent, all relationships do this.  What makes soul mates so special?  Well, soul mates rev it up a notch, stomp full-fledged on the gas pedal, and COMPEL you to do your work, in a very intense way, that is hard to ignore.  Soul mates got your attention, all right.

This is why I teach that all soul mates are “romantic” in that sense.  Because even th0ugh all relationships are important, and you may love your dog or goldfish very much, they are not going to do this for you.  And the connection that you have to your friends and family may be deep and wonderful, but they don’t have this kind of impact on you in quite the same way.  Also, there are special dynamics and patterns in the soul mate connection that are custom-designed to shoot your soul in a rocket booster towards a very deep awakening.  A sexual and romantic component, for lack of a better descriptor, is a powerful forceful motivator and soul connector.  The feeling of wanting to unite male and female polarities is very strong.  By this I am talking about the masculine and feminine energies of the universe, not physical sex or bodies.  This is a different kind of connection from others in your soul group.  Please see my post, Signs of a Soul Mate or Twin Flame for the common indicators and patterns that I am talking about.


So what is a soul mate?  An energetic SOUL-based tie to another human being.  If you are familiar with the concept of energy centers or chakras, we can say that the common connection points are the sacral, heart, and third eye chakras.  Soul mates may delude themselves or deny that the connection goes both ways, but a soul mate connection is not unrequited love.  A person may have varying levels of awareness about the existence of the connection, but it  is not one-sided.  It is pretty much hard to ignore for both people.


Secondly, a soul mate connection is a spiritual, deep connection with a soul that COMPELS you to grow and learn lessons about yourself, love and relationships.  You can also think of it as a soul “contract,”  that involves the learning and teaching of lessons, which may have past life ties, and there are always lesson themes.  What are these lessons?  That is for you to find out, but many common ones are:  abandonment, personal integrity and honesty, insecurity, leaving situations and relationships that no longer work for you, fear of commitment, and even, fear of love.  You would be surprised, but many people faced with the prospect of unconditional love, are bewildered and terrified of actually having it.  Many soul mate lessons, more simply put, require that you make a choice between the polar opposites of fear and love.  In the big picture of soul development, we are all learning the difference between unconditional love and egoic love.


I must stress that soul mate connections are not always about the relationship.  This is where we get hooked on the concept of the relationship, and not about its real purpose–which is our own growth as a soul.